Posts

New start, again

I'm 25 years old this year. Unbelievable.   I decided to leave social media (except youtube) for good. There nothing wrong with it, but my mental health been badly affected by it. Sometimes I feel like a psycho, stalker, and narcissist. The worst person in the world. Toxic. Always compare myself with people's lives. Looking at myself, feeling depressed as ever. Thats why I want to make an end to it. I think I have PTSD, i always cry thinking about my brother's presence when he's here. I mourning and cry endlessly, rapid heartbeat, sweating, feeling suicidal. He used to abused me. Mentally, physically. And even want to kick me out of the house. Its acceptable if he want to teach me a lesson before my 20's. Sadly, he did the same in my 20's. I'm not a kid anymore. I feel left out. He kissed other sister but not me.  He compared me to others when I unable to give my best. Not just him, my father as well.  I feel like I dont deserve anyone's love.  I went al
Post a Comment
Read more

Liability

Baby really hurt me, crying in the taxi He don't wanna know me Says he made the big mistake of dancing in my storm Says it was poison So I guess I'll go home Into the arms of the girl that I love The only love I haven't screwed up She's so hard to please, but she's a forest fire I do my best to meet her demands, play at romance, we slow dance In the living room, but all that a stranger would see Is one girl swaying alone, stroking her cheek They say, "You're a little much for me You're a liability You're a little much for me" So they pull back, make other plans I understand, I'm a liability Get you wild, make you leave I'm a little much for e-a-na-na-na, everyone The truth is I am a toy that people enjoy 'Til all of the tricks don't work anymore And then they are bored of me I know that it's exciting running through the night, but Every perfect summer's eating me alive until you're gone Better on my own They say, &qu
Post a Comment
Read more